Tag Archives: Jolie

Salt: A review

So the other day, my wife and I decided to go see a movie. I wanted to see Dinner with the Schmucks. My wife wanted to see Salt.

Of course, I lost out. So off to Salt we went.

And if you plan on seeing it, don’t. It’s not a good movie. I can’t actually believe all the good reviews it has been getting. Roger Ebert, for example, gave it four out of four stars, despite writing “It’s gloriously absurd. This movie has holes in it big enough to drive the whole movie through. The laws of physics seem to be suspended here the same way as in a Road Runner cartoon.”

I’m sorry, but the movie was bland and predictable.  And those plot holes? Kind of important.

I’m not going to go into all the details. Basically, in the movie, Angelina Jolie’s character, a CIA agent named Evelyn Salt, is accused of being a Russian spy. Mayhem ensues.

Without giving too much away, there’s a scene where the character is accused of killing the Russian president after breaking into a secured area and taking down about 15 trained guys. Of course, with the CIA involved, secret service, the Russian authorities and what not, what happens when the murderer is captured? They’re taken away in a convoy of three NYPD police cars! Seriously? That’s it? I wonder if the person if going to escape with protection like that? Yeesh.

Like I said, there were parts that were very predictable. If you pay even the slightest bit attention, you’ll figure it out, even as things are happening.

I would give this movie one out of five stars.

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40 best celebrity rumours ever

Although it’s a couple of years old at this point, the following blog intrigued me.

Did Jennifer Lopez insure her butt?

Did Jennifer Lopez insure her butt?

It’s basically a list of the top 40 celebrity rumours of all time, plus a few paragraphs about each rumour.

It’s a pretty complete list too. While I won’t give away what #1 is, it was fun to read details on many of the rumours I’ve heard over the years.

Some samples:

• Was J. Edgar Hoover a cross-dresser?

• Did Marisa Tomei win an Oscar by mistake?

• Did Angelina Jolie and her brother have an incestuous relationship?

• Is Jim Morrison alive?

• Did Marilyn Manson play Paul Pfeiffer on The Wonder Years?

• Did Jennifer Lopez insure her butt?

There were also a ton I never heard, but was a good read. I recommend checking it out when you have a few minutes to spare.

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I don’t care about celebrities’ thoughts on octuplets

See, originally, I didn’t want to blog about Nadya Suleman.

Octuplet mom Nadya Suleman is now hitting the news station circuit.

Octuplet mom Nadya Suleman is now hitting the news station circuit.

She’s the woman who gave birth to octuplets a month or so ago. Apparently, this woman’s personal life now means everyone can tell her how she is supposed to live her life and how many children she’s allowed to have.

Fine, I get it. People think she’s a bad mom for having another eight kids. But lately, she’s been turned into a celebrity bigger than Britney Spears and Paris Hilton.

First, was all the comparisons to Angelina Jolie. Kind of silly, but I think that’s what originally started making her a celebrity.

The debate over whether her doctor should have allowed her to do this is what made it a news story, but the look-alike thing is what makes her a celebrity.

Now, quality entertainment (I use those words very loosely) programs such as Entertainment Tonight, Entertainment Tonight Canada, Access Hollywood and some others I don’t know the names of, spend the first few minutes of every program asking celebrities what they think of the octuplets mom.

*disclaimer: I don’t watch these shows, my wife does. I actually leave the room five minutes in to the program to go play Playstation because they make me sick.

 

I have a small question: Who cares? Why would anyone care what Rosie O’Donnell thinks of Nadya Suleman? To use paraphrase one of her most famous quotes: “Why does she get to be the moral compass for other mothers across the world?”

Cher also weighed in with her thoughts.

Personally, though, I’m still holding out hope that the youngest kid from Home Improvement will be giving his opinion of the whole thing.

Why do we care what celebrities think of the octuplet mom?

Why do we care what celebrities think of the octuplet mom?

As for Nadya Suleman, if she wants to have more kids, why is it up to us to tell her she’s not allowed? Does anyone tell Michelle Duggar, who gave birth to her 18th child last year, to stop, even though she wants more?

If Suleman wanted more kids, it’s not our place to tell her no. I certainly wouldn’t appreciate it if people told me to stop having kids or letting me know I was a bad parent.

She now has the opportunity to make money (she’s looking for $2 million after appearing on Oprah, and has been offered $1 million to star in a porn video under the Vivid Entertainment company). If successful, she’ll be able to afford to raise her kids.

Let her decide what is best for her life and her kids’ life, and leave her alone.

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AskMen.com’s most desirable woman

So AskMen.com released their list of top 99 Most Desirable Women of 2009.

According to this Yahoo article:

“James Bassil, editor-in-chief of AskMen.com, said the list was a “pulse-check” of the women that readers were not only following but also perceived as more than just a pretty face.

“Obviously good looks are one quality but intelligence, ambition and humor also count,” Bassil told Reuters.

“There are women in their mid to late 30s on this list who may be old by industry standards but you see more mature women on this list. The younger women getting a lot of play on gossip sites haven’t had the time to accumulate the achievements that a lot of these women have.”

Some thoughts on some of the top 99, plus the top 10 in reverse order.

Tina Fey

Tina Fey

97. Tina Fey: I really thought she would be higher, after all the media attention of her spoofing Sarah Palin and her Emmys and Golden Globe awards.

90. Britney Spears: How the mighty have fallen. Remember a few years ago when people like Britney used to dominate this list?

72. Yunjin Kim: My favourite character from Lost. I’m glad she made this list.

70. Jessica Simpson: Not sure how she made it on the list, because I don’t know anything she’s done since Dukes of Hazard.

55. Maria Menounos: I have to blog about her annoying hair commercial one of these days.

52. Christina Hendricks: I included her because she was on the TV show Firefly. She now stars in Mad Men.

50. Beyonce: How does someone usually recognized as so hot end up so low on the list.

45. Eva Longoria: I’ve never seen the appeal of her.

42. Angelina Jolie: Again, I’ve never really seen the appeal of her. Can someone explain it to me? Was it when she made out with her brother? Or when she carried a vial of blood around her neck?

41. Hayden Panettiere: From Heroes, and probably the youngest one on the list.

Summer Glau

Summer Glau

36. Summer Glau: Her character in Firefly and Serenity was awesome, but I think she’s on the list for her role in the Terminator television series.

35. Christina Aguilera: A combination of my Britney Spears and Jessica Simpson comments.

31. Isla Fisher: Should be higher, but she almost makes me want to Confessions of a Shopaholic.

22. Evangeline Lilly: Isn’t it funny how she’s one of the top most desirable women in the world, but couldn’t make the list for the Gemini Award of hottest Canadian actress?

16. Jessica Biel: Appearing nude in a film this year, which is why she’s probably on this list.

15. Jessica Alba: There’s always the debate: Which Jessica is hotter? So it’s probably appropriate the two of them are side by side on the list.

12. Emmanuelle Chriqui: The highest rated Canadian on the list.

10. Kate Beckinsale: She’s been in a lot of stuff, but I couldn’t think of one memorable role she’s had.

9. Kristen Bell: I love almost every thing she does (Heroes, Forgetting Sarah Marshall), she’s a huge hockey fan, but is a vegetarian.

8. Rihanna: I’m sorry, but it has to be said: Umbrella is the worst song of the past five years.

7. Scarlett Johansson: Again, no idea of the appeal of her.

6. Alessandra Ambrosio: Yeah, I’ve never heard of her either.

Anne Hathaway

Anne Hathaway

5. Anne Hathaway: She’s been getting a lot of attention lately, and deservedly so. If she’s in a movie, I want to watch it because odds are, it will be a good movie.

4. Keeley Hazell: A former Page 3 model in the Sun in Britain, but I am surprised she is so high on the list.

3. Marisa Miller:  A model, famous for being on the cover of Sports Illustrated.

2. Megan Fox: From the movie Transformers. And that’s all I know. But it sparked a debate after the movie between me, my wife and our couple friends of her age.

1. Eva Mendes: Very surprised by the number one selection. I haven’t seen any of work her since Hitch in 2003, but she must be doing something good if she’s number one.

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Hot moms

So FoxNews.com came out with a list late last week. It was the hottest moms in Hollywood. It was surprising, because of who finished Number 1, and where other moms finished (#11 was the biggest shock).

Can you believe Charisma Carpenter didn't make the list?

Can you believe Charisma Carpenter didn't make the list?

Some of those missing from the list: Jennifer Lopez, Christina Aguilera, Pamela Anderson, Jenny McCarthy, Denise Richards, Uma Thurman, Jennifer Garner, Charisma Carpenter, Kate Hudson, Kate Beckinsale, Liv Tyler, Reese Witherspoon, Katie Holmes, Julia Roberts, Britney Spears, Catherine Zeta-Jones, Shania Twain, Salma Hayek.

Anyways, below is the the list, starting with #11 and working it’s way to #1.

#11: Angelina Jolie: This was the most shocking listing. Most people would put her in the top five, if not the very top of the list. Jolie has six kids, from all parts of the world. It’s almost as if she’s trying to put together an international soccer team.

#10: Gwen Stefani: The former No Doubt rocker has one child and lots of gold records.

#9: Nicole Richie: Not sure how she’s rated as one of the hottest, unless by hottest, you mean skinniest.

Isla Fisher

Isla Fisher

#8. Isla Fisher: Should be ranked much higher. The red-headed star of Wedding Crashers, Fisher is married to Sacha Cohen, better known as Borat.

#7. Heidi Klum: The supermodel mother of three, Klum is still hot at the age of 35.

#6. Cindy Crawford: The second supermodel on this list, it seems as if Crawford has been around forever.

#5. Demi Moore: She’s the oldest woman on the list, and has had none of the kids with her current husband, Ashton Kutcher. Instead, the father is Bruce Willis, which automatically makes them cooler.

#4. Jessica Alba: A mother of one, and one of the youngest mothers on this list, this is the choice that has most men drooling.

Kelly Ripa

Kelly Ripa

#3. Faith Hill: The country-singing sensation is married to another country-singing sensation, Tim McGraw.

#2. Halle Berry: Never mind the fact that she’s been in as many bad films as good ones, she never seems to age.

#1. Kelly Ripa: I had the same reaction. What? Don’t get me wrong. I like Kelly. She’s funny, hardworking and cute, but to be #1 on the top list of hottest Hollywood moms is pushing it a little. Maybe Fox News can use a little Tide to Go on this selection and get a do-over.

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