Almost there

July 1 is the big day.

No, not a day off from work. Not Canada’s birthday.

But the beginning of the NHL free agent frenzy.

I just hope Montreal signs Mats Sundin quickly. I don’t need to sit through three more weeks of “will he or won’t he.”

Real-life Grand Theft Auto

It seems a bunch of teenagers in New York don’t know the difference between life and reality.

The six teens decided to emulate Grand Theft Auto, and mugged a man, robbed a motorist and smashed a passing van with a bat (you can read the full story here).

In the game though, when you get arrested by the cops, you get a bit of cash taken away, all your weapons, but then you’re out on the streets.

It would be nice to see these punks in jail for six months or so, just to show them that life doesn’t always imitate art (or video games).

Name change

What’s up with people wanting to change their names to something stupid?

Maybe it’s the Simpsons episode where Homer changes his name to Max Power (which he got from one of the settings on the hair dryer). But there are always stories about people wanting to change their name, or give their kids a bad name.

In 2005, Melissa Heuschkel from Conneticut put an auction up on eBay for someone to name her baby. GoldenPalace.com bought the rights for $15,500, so now the kid has to go through life being named Goldenpalace.com. Imagine signing that on checks or tests.

A few years back, a Chinese couple tried to name their baby “@”. Not the name, but the symbol, like Prince used to have.

And there are plenty of stories of Chinese parents this year naming their baby Olympics because of the Games being held there this year.

A swedish couple wants to name their baby Metallica.

And there was an English couple who gave their child 23 middle names — all players from his favourite soccer team, Manchester United.

Now, the latest case, which you can read here, has to do with a guy in Mexico named Variable. He wants to change his name to “F— Censorship.” Although he would actually spell out the F-word.

Maybe normal names won’t do it anymore, but at least take names that won’t get your kids picked on at school.

Keep them or don’t sign them

I understand the no trade clause in the NHL is a powerful tool. It’s a way to entice players to sign with your team, and it’s a powerful bargaining chip for players who don’t want to be traded.

But it seems the rumour mill is now going crazy, and teams resign their players, and then possibly trade them before the clause kicks in.

First it was Jason Spezza of the Ottawa Senators (until general manager Bryan Murray stepped in to say it wasn’t true). Now it’s Dan Boyle of the Tampa Bay Lightning.

Maybe it’s because of the Toronto Maple Leafs, or the inability of GMs to find a trade because players invoke their clauses, but I’m starting to get a little sick of hearing about no-trade clauses.

Make a new rule. If they have a no-trade clause, they’re stuck with it. The player can’t demand a trade, the GMs can trade them. Truly make it a no-trade clause.

Pigeon smugglers

There’s nothing prisoners won’t try.

A Reuters story talks about how prisoners in Brazil were training carrier pigeons to deliver cell phones and drugs (read the story here). Talk about getting high.

Maybe Prison Break can use this as a new plot next season.

Celine Dion covers AC/DC

Celine Dion was just named as having the worst cover of a song of all time, when she did You Shook Me All Night Long. This is according to a poll by Total Guitar Magazine (read the story here).

For those who haven’t seen it, here’s the video.

One year later

One year ago on Wednesday, the bodies of Chris Benoit and his family were found dead.

I found out when my wife and I came home from a walk, and I flipped on WWE Raw. Instead of the normal show, it was a recap of Benoit’s best matches. On the ticker, it stated Benoit and his family had died, but no other details were available.

Within a couple of days, it all came out. Chris had killed his son and his wife, and then took his own life, in a double murder-sucicide. Although there have been theories about why Benoit did it, no one knows for sure.

Benoit was my favourite wrestler. I have his Hard Knocks DVD. My favourite wrestling match is when he won the 2004 Royal Rumble, entering number 1 and lasting all the way to the end. He was Canadian and a great wrestler.

Now, one year later, I don’t know how to feel about him. The WWE has pretty much eliminated him from all their programming. His pictures aren’t on the website. His videos are gone. This isn’t something they can continue to do. As they release DVDs and best-of compilations, he’ll have to be included. He’s in too much programming to ingore him completely.

For example, when they release a best of Randy Orton DVD, they’ll have to include his first world championship title. But he won it against Chris Benoit.

But they’ll have to bring him back slowly. It would create too much outrage to bring him back all at once. I think they’ve started by having wrestlers do some of his finishing moves in the ring.

For me, I haven’t been able to watch any of his matches since last year. I don’t know how I’ll react when I do. Can I enjoy the match knowing what he did? Will I be able to forget what he did for 20 minutes? Can I suspend my disbelief and just enjoy the wrestling match for the actual wrestling?

I’m not sure. I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to watch his stuff again.

Ryder to where?

With the hockey offseason upon us, a lot of people are wondering about free agents.

The Montreal Canadiens are looking to sign most of their guys, plus maybe one or two more.

But they won’t be signing Michael Ryder, and that doesn’t make me happy.

Ryder’s my favourite player (a newfie on my favourite team, how could he not be?). I think he was playing well early on in the season, but just wasn’t getting the goals. So he started getting demoted, benched, and trade rumoured.

 

One of two things will probably happen to him now:

 

1) He signs with the wrong team, and never puts up numbers like what he once had and is out of the league in a few years, similar to what happened to Anson Carter a few years ago.

 

2) He signs with the right team, scores 40-50 goals for a while, and comes back to haunt Montreal when ever we play that team (like John Leclair). For some reason, I can see him going to the Boston Bruins, playing with Marc Savard, and doing this. The reason I think Boston is the right team is because of the coach, Claude Julien. Julien coached him in juniors, and was the coach of the Habs and brought him into the starting lineup. Ryder plays his best hockey under Julien, so a move there might be the best thing for Ryder, even if it’s for less money then he might make elsewhere.

One down…

51 to go.

On Friday night, I managed to complete the first item on my list of things I’ve always wanted to do. I attended the NHL draft here in Ottawa, which was #11 on my list.

It was lots of fun thanks to trades (although that meant my favourite team, the Montreal Canadiens, never got to choose). We also gave Wayne Gretzky the loudest and longest ovation of the night.

Steve Stamkos was selected first overall. Hopefully, he becomes a superstar so we can one day say “I was there when he was drafted.” But Stamkos shook hands with three rows and about 40 people before making it to the podium. Next time, you can wait until after, eh Stamkos?

EDIT: The other great thing about the night was the fans’ reaction to the Toronto Maple Leafs. Lots of booing every time they were even shown on the scoreboard, but it was crazy when they got up to announce their pick.

Montreal traded their pick to Calgary for Alex Tanguay, which is okay. They have a guy who can get 80 points a season, help out the other players, and fits in well. He’ll probably replace Michael Ryder on the team.

Toronto also gave Montreal rights to talk to Mats Sundin. I think it would be great if Montreal could land Sundin before July 1. All of a sudden, they would have three potential scoring lines. They’d have Koivu, Higgins, Sundin, Tanguay, Kovalev, Plekanec, and the Kostitsyn brothers: That’s eight scoring threats for the top three lines. They would then have four good role players for the rest of the lineup. Look for Latendresses to benefit greatly from all this. I think they would put him on the third line with two of those players, which should help his stock greatly.

High school pregnancy

In the movie, American Pie, a group of four friends make a pact to lose their virginity by prom.

Some Massachusetts high school students have taken it a step further. Apparently they have made a pact to get themselves pregnant.

The following was written in an Associated Press article:

Gloucester High School principal Joseph Sullivan told Time magazine in a story published Wednesday that the girls confessed to making the pact after the school began investigating a rise in pregnancies that has left 17 girls at the school carrying a child.

Normally, there are about four pregnancies a year at the school.

He said nearly half of the expecting students, none over 16, were involved in the pact.

Sullivan told Time that students were coming to the school clinic multiple times to get pregnancy tests, and “seemed more upset when they weren’t pregnant than when they were.”

Sullivan said some of the girls reacted to the news they were pregnant with high fives and plans for baby showers.

He said one of the fathers was a 24-year-old homeless man.

I know friends are supposed to stick together, but that may be pushing it a little too much.